We all have those moments—days when everything feels like too much, when stress piles up, or when we’re overwhelmed by emotions that seem impossible to control. We can’t wait to get home, and often, we can’t wait to turn on the tv or scroll on social media to zone out and unwind. These are attempts to self-sooth, and while these habits can temporarily distract us from our stress or emotions, they may not be so helpful in the long term. Here are some habits that are NOT conducive to stress relief and unwinding.
Not So Helpful Habits
1. Overeating or Emotional Eating
It’s tempting to reach for comfort food when we’re stressed or upset. That’s why it’s called comfort food! These are fine in moderation, but turning to food as a primary way to soothe yourself can lead to unhealthy patterns. Eating mindlessly or in excess often leaves us feeling worse afterward, physically and emotionally.
2. Excessive Screen Time
Zoning out in front of the TV, scrolling through social media, or getting lost in a video game can be an easy go-to. While a little distraction can be helpful, too much screen time can become a way of avoiding our emotions instead of dealing with them. It’s easy to lose hours to screens, only to realize that the problem you were trying to avoid is still there—and now you’re more stressed out because you’ve also wasted time.
3. Substance Use
Sometimes people turn to alcohol, drugs, or even prescription medication to numb their feelings or escape stress.
While these substances might offer temporary relief, they can quickly become a crutch that leads to dependency or addiction. The relief they provide is short-lived and often comes with serious consequences that can make things much worse.
4. Avoidance and Procrastination
Avoiding the things that stress us out or putting off important tasks might feel like self-care in the moment, but it’s really just a way of delaying the inevitable. Procrastination can create a cycle of stress and anxiety that only grows as deadlines loom closer or responsibilities pile up. What feels like a break is often just postponing more stress for later.
Habits That Can Be Helpful
1. Mindful Breathing and Meditation
One of the simplest yet most powerful self-soothing habits is mindful breathing. It sounds almost too easy to be effective, but taking a few minutes to focus on your breath can work wonders. It’s like hitting the reset button on your nervous system.
Meditation, even in small doses, can help you center yourself, calm your mind, and find a sense of peace in the chaos. It’s like giving your brain a much-needed break.
2. Physical Movement
Moving your body is another great way to self-soothe. This doesn’t have to be an intense workout at the gym (unless that’s your thing). It could be as simple as taking a walk outside, doing some gentle yoga, or even dancing around your living room. Physical movement helps release built-up tension and stress, and it gets those endorphins flowing. It’s a way of reconnecting with your body and reminding yourself that you’re alive and capable.
3. Creative Expression
Whether it’s drawing, writing, playing music, or crafting, creative expression can be a powerful outlet for emotions. When you’re feeling overwhelmed, letting your creativity flow can help you process what’s going on inside. It’s a way of giving your feelings a voice and finding clarity through the act of creation.
4. Connecting with Loved Ones
Sometimes, the best self-soothing comes from the people who care about us. Reaching out to a friend, family member, or partner when you’re feeling down can help you feel supported and understood. Just talking about what you’re going through can lift that weight off your shoulders.
Finding the Balance
The key to healthy self-soothing is balance. It’s about being mindful of what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. Are you choosing this habit because it genuinely helps you feel better and take care of yourself, or because it offers a quick escape from discomfort? Sometimes it’s okay to do things like indulge in a little mindless TV or treat yourself to some comfort food. The trick is to make sure these habits don’t become your go-to solution every time you feel stressed or emotional.
The good news is, we’re all capable of changing our habits and developing new, healthier ones. It’s about being kind to yourself, recognizing when you’re leaning on something that isn’t serving you, and gently steering yourself back toward habits that truly nurture and heal you.
Remember, self-soothing isn’t about avoiding your feelings; it’s about finding healthy ways to cope with them. It’s about taking care of yourself in a way that builds you up, not tears you down. You deserve to feel good and care for yourself well.
