In this season of holidays and family gatherings we may find ourselves trying to intervene in another relationship for various reasons. This is referred to as a triangle, and focusing on a third party, often unconsciously, acts to reduce the emotional intensity between two individuals. This is done in an effort to relieve anxiety and keeps us from addressing the actual source of conflict. If you do not allow yourself to “get pulled in,” then hidden issues begin to surface as each person communicates directly with the other without you being in the middle. By staying calm and staying out, even when you feel anxiety to get involved, you allow the other two people to manage their relationship. If you would like to learn more about triangles and how to avoid them, call The Refuge Center for Counseling at 615.591.5262 and visit us at www.refugecenter.org.